Vital anti-flu tips

With everybody running around getting the flu shot and/or getting sick, i felt it prudent to post some anti-flu tips.

1. DO NOT GET THE FLU. Remember, prevention is still the best form of medicine. That means no inhaling flu microbes, no licking strange bathroom tiles, and no eating the flu. I am looking sternly in your direction, flu-fetish community.
2. KILL ALL RATS ON SIGHT. Remember that they are known to carry the flu and may wheeze on you unexpectedly if they get too close! I am sorry rats I love you all but this must be done! Also, small funny looking dogs.
3. WHEN A FAMILY MEMBER OR FRIEND GETS THE FLU, BURN THEIR BODIES. This can be very difficult for a number of reasons. Sometimes it is hard to accept that you have to part with a loved one. Sometimes the loved one is saying "Man quit it, stop trying to burn me man" like Darryl is doing now (Darryl has the flu I am so sorry Darryl I will miss you so much) but it is too late for them and you must contain the disease.

That should keep you all healthy for a while.